A mother and her adult daughter on Zoom--or some other video chat. Both have New York or Boston accents and big hair, à la The Nanny.

Daughter: Ma. Ma. Ma. Can ya hear me?

Ma: Deborah? Deborah. Deb. 

Daughter: Yeah.

Ma: Deb.

Daughter. Yeah.

Ma: Deborah.

Daughter: Ma. I can hear you.

Ma: Oh there you are, Deborah.

Daughter: OK, Ma. So last week I was down there, I opened a tastyworks account for you.

Ma: Yeah.

Daughter: Yeah, and I downloaded the software. 

Ma: Yeah.

Daughter: I’ve been doin’ OK, making a tidy sum, so I figured I’d set you up too, give you somethin’ else to focus on besides your arthritis. 

Ma: Oy, Debbie, you’re always worryin’ about me–I’m fine–(grabs back) OHHHhh! Ohhhh!

Daughter: Ma.

Ma: I’m fine. 

Daughter: OK, so I’m gonna walk you through this–

Ma: I watch my stories every day, I’ve got that bird house outside the window I look at…

Daughter: Ma, I was thinkin’ a hobby where you use more than your eyeballs..

Ma: I’m on neighborhood watch—you know someone’s gotta keep an eye on that postal worker who takes that suspiciously circuitous route.

Daughter: Ma, you need to be usin’ your brain. Remember what Dr. Schwartz said? “Use or it lose it.”

Ma: Yeah, yeah.

Daughter: This is gonna have you thinkin’, and learnin’, and doin’ a little math–

Ma: Egghhh.

Daughter: –and makin’ decisions, and it’s actually really fun and interesting.

Ma: We’ll see.

Daughter: Ok, so we’ll go step by step.

Ma: Uh-huh.

Daughter: Click on the tastyworks icon.

Ma: Icon...icon…

Daughter: It’s the–

Ma: Icon...

Daughter: It’s the red circle with the T-W in it.

Ma: Oh, aright.

Daughter. You in?

Ma: It’s updating I think.

Daughter: OK…

Ma: Launching something…

Daughter: OK.

Ma: What’s my password?

Daughter: I told you this, it’s Daddy’s least favorite pie.

Ma: (henpecking at keyboard) “Bawww----stttooonnn Crreeaaam.” OK. Sign In. Aright.

Daughter: You in?

Ma: Initializing Broke-ah-rage Session…

Daughter: Uh-huhhh...

Ma: I’m in!

Daughter: Great, Ma! Well done. See? Ya still got it. Now do you see the section on the righthand side–

(Ma’s video is breaking up)

Ma: Deh–

Daughter: Ma?

Ma: –Rah

Daughter: Ma.

Ma: -Eh-

Daughter: Ma.

Ma: (broken speech)

Daughter: Well, we got you into the platform. Maybe next time we can actually put on a trade.

Ma: (broken speech)

Daughter: Bye, Ma.

Ma: (broken speech)

Daughter: I’ll call you later.

Ma: (broken speech)

Daughter: Yeah, me too.

Ma: (broken speech)

Daughter: Mhmm.

Ma: (broken speech)

Daughter: Bye.

(End of call.)

(Then, tastytrade branding comes in with some sort of CTA—something like:

“Keep that brain alive. Trade on tastyworks.” )