“A Whole New Trade”
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This parody of Aladdin’s “A Whole New World” was meant to act as an interstitial, social media post, and potentially a paid ad (if Disney didn’t get too litigious). The final product would be a “music video” of sorts, following two traders joyfully (and comedically) celebrating their discovery of tastytrade, and its trading mechanics.
Lyrics
Trader #1:
You’ve been trading those stocks;
Profits paltry if any.
Tell me, trader, now when did you
Last let probability guide?
I can open your eyes,
Take you contract by contract,
Bullish, bearish, and neutral
On a magic options ride!
A whole new trade;
Some new fantastic strategies;
Don’t only invest long-term
Or trust advisor firms
Who claim they can guess direction.
Trader #2:
A whole new trade;
A dazzling game I never knew,
But when I trade this way
I can see each market day
That now I’m bidding randomness adieu (Trader #1: Now you’re bidding randomness adieu!)
Leveraged buying power,
Delta’s helping to guide me,
Gamma’s telling me to roll my trades,
With 21 days to go.
A whole new trade (Trader #1: Don’t you be risk averse)
A bunch of strategies to learn (Trader #1: collect a third of the strike width)
I’m like a rising star,
With a new repertoire,
I can’t go back to trading stupid stocks…
Trader #1:
A whole new trade; (Trader #2: Every fill a surprise)
Jade lizards, strangles, and short spreads (Trader #2: Every trade it feels better)
Both:
We’re learning on tastytrade;
Our theta’s decayed;
Let me accumulate premium with you...
Trader #1:
A whole new trade, (Trader #2: A whole new trade)
That’s what we need; (Trader #2: That’s what we need)
Trader #1:
Our prayers are answered…
Trader #2:
A deviation that’s standard…
Both:
For you and me.